To run or not to run?

As I was walking from the office to the train in the beautiful sunshine yesterday I was thinking about what it would take to get me running again.

I've discovered that the thing I was struggling with was the schedule, not the running/exercise itself. I felt like I "had" to do it; I "had" to stick to the schedule. As a result, I was not enoying the activities because I felt a sense of obligation to do them.

Generally speaking I am a "social exerciser." I enjoy the cameraderie of running and biking with friends. I enjoy solo running from time to time, but I almost always prefer to have company. For cycling, I ALWAYS prefer to have company: I don't like riding alone.

I'm also not really big on classes - spin class, body pump, yoga, whatever. I'm not really a "class" person. Now that's different than getting together with a group of friends for an indoor trainer ride - I quite like doing that (if it's the only option in the winter - I still prefer the outdoor ride).

So, going back to my original question: What will it take? Well, I know I will run again when I want to run. Not because I can't stand NOT running. It's a subtle difference, but it's very clear in my mind. Some people have a compulsion to run, and they will start running again because they just can't stand NOT running. I've been that person in the past. But this time, I am more focused on starting to run again because I want to enjoy the experience of running, not because I don't like the experience of NOT running. I'm not sure if I'm explaining this clearly, but it's the best I can do.

I did run yesterday. Briefly. I was again inspired to go for a walk in the sunshine when I got home from work. I took a slightly different route than I had the day before. Again, I had to run to catch a light, but then went right back to my walk. Towards the end, a song came on my iPod that inspired me to run, so I did. How long is a song? 4-5 minutes? That's about how long I ran. I felt very sluggish at first, and winded after I stopped. Ugh. I hope I was just having a bad day because it almost felt like how I felt 12 years ago when I first started running outside.

Today is Wednesday. The sun is shining and the weather will again be warm. I think I might want to run this afternoon. We'll see.

ETA: When I got home from my walk/run yesterday I opened the mail. Inside was my finisher's certificate from the Las Vegas Marathon. It's funny, because as I was struggling to run the three blocks a few minutes earlier, I was thinking that anyone who saw me would never imagine that I am a three-time Ironman and four-time marathoner! LOL Maybe I needed to see that certificate to remind me that I am.